What a relief! Judgement day came and went without too much obvious bother, apart from more sporting revelations about the sexual exploits of an overpaid premiership footballer and his dodgy super-injunction.
For those of you unaware, Saturday 21st May 2011 was supposed to be 'Judgement Day' when Jesus returned to take charge of us all, by reaping carnage and saving all true followers; the whole thing culminating with God annihilating the world on 21st October 2011 (five days before my 25th wedding anniversary).
Well, I decided to stay in bed all day Saturday, just in case the worst happened. As it turned out, things were generally uneventful, so either Jesus has decided a slow burn transition to Armageddon, or is planning a stealth approach by not revealing his hand too soon. Unlike some followers, I'm glad I didn't empty my bank account and give away all of my possessions in preparation for the big bang.
That said, he may have removed all of his true followers without our knowledge, and has decided to leave the dirty work to God in October. Therefore we are not yet out of the woods. I have checked my diary, and note that the 21st October is on a Friday (a working day). Therefore if I plan on repeating my 'stay in bed' strategy for part two of the latest prediction that 'the end is nigh', I will have to ask my boss for the day off.
Judgement Day and the end of the world is however the least of my worries – if anyone messes with my wedding anniversary, they will have the missus to deal with. Armageddon will seem like a walk in the park!
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